Intrinsic Traits, Positive Thinking and Being Delusional

(Elaborated forum post)

There are some guys (I may or may not be one of them), who need to have more good real qualities in order to gain, and especially to keep the level of woman they desire. Do you excite women with your passion and your brilliant future? Do you have the depth of thought and background to stimulate a smart woman? Are you attractive physically? Can you make her feel feminine and sexy? Can you provide for her financially as well as her other options? Can you blow her away in the sack?

The community is partly about marketing, but also about improving the quality of the product. The quality of the product matters, the marketing just earns you the opportunity for an introduction. For long term I would say the quality of the product is the only thing that matters.

The community is largely based around the idea that any guy can get any woman if he just does the right things which I believe is misleading.

I would say that just about any bag of traits, sufficiently polished, can pick up someone in a bar and get laid. Maybe even consistently. But there's a world of difference between that and the claim that any bag of traits, when sufficiently polished, can win over any woman. The good news is that with work, some of the intrinsic traits can be changed over time. Over time, any woman may be reachable, but at a given point in time, there will always be some women who are simply out of reach.

Does this contradict the idea that you should believe in yourself 100%? To have self-confidence, which is massively attractive, shouldn't you reject the negative energy of the nay-sayers and haters, and stay on the positive message that any woman would be absolutely privileged to be with you?

I am all for positive thinking.

There is a big difference between telling yourself you can become the most awesome man on the planet, vs. telling yourself you already are. One way motivates you to improve, and the other kills that motivation.

I think it's good to believe that you're the baddest motherfucker on the planet, in some contexts. But if it stops you from realistically assessing what good qualities you have and what needs improvement, then it's hurting you.

Don't dwell on the negative, and make sure to push the boundaries of what is possible, rather than sitting believing "I can't." But don't let the positive thinking stop you from being realistic.